Learning to Understand our Hatred

If we feel hatred toward another person or group, then learning to understand our hatred is the first step to resolving and living with these feelings. Like many feelings, hatred has a framework, but the details that cause it to manifest are different for each and every person.

Hatred is a Complicated Emotion

When you honestly wish to cope with hatred, it requires an unraveling of layers. Each layer needs to be resolved by a unique set of actions. And the emotional levels of each layer is not uniform, the intensity level of the layers will differ from person to person.

The first step is a mandatory one. When hatred is felt about someone or something, then this means a judgment of some sort has been rendered against the object of hate. The first step is identifying and reexamining the judgment you have proclaimed against the offender this is justifying your hatred.

The objective here is to release the judgment you have made. When you continue to judge, you continue supplying the fuel to the hatred. Ask yourself why you made the judgment and why you think it is justified. It is amazing how many people continue to hate and cannot identify the original judgment made against the offender. This is often the case for long-drawn-out acts of hatred – such as long-running feuds between families or tribes.

Peeling Away the Layers of Judgment Causing Hatred

The next step is finding out the reasons for the judgment you have placed against the object of your hatred. Depending on the situation, this could be very simple or very difficult, but there are some standard sources that could prove to be helpful.

Let it be said here that there are times when your anger is justified, and the accused is guilty of wrongdoing. When this is the case, the judgment still needs to be released and an act of either forgiveness or coping has to ensure – otherwise, the hatred will become very destructive to you emotionally.

In this article, we are addressing errors of reasoning that lead to misplaced judgments of others. Let us examine some of the more standard errors of reasoning.

Assigning Blame to Others

The question here is who do assign responsibility to when awful things happen to us? When we assign blame to others, the reason may not be so obvious. At times, we human beings tend to be very concerned with our status among others – particularly our peers. A subconscious part of us will often assign blame in order to preserve our pride and self-esteem. Sadly, there are times when the blaming will elevate into hatred. This is particularly true when the person blamed retaliates.

Protecting of Community

Whenever an outside group is perceived to encroach upon the rights and ‘turf’ of another group, harsh judgments can be justified for the good of the community. As we have seen in the news, this scenario can get very dangerous, and very rapidly at times. The reason is that group members keep fueling the hatred of each other.

Elevation of Fear

There are times when we see others as a legitimate threat to our safety and well-being. Whenever people are convinced there is a danger to the community, hatred grows in abundance. This scenario produces an environment of “kill or be killed”. The question is whether or not the threat is real.

Declining Respect

Whenever a person or group of people is no longer respected as human beings, when they no longer deserve the common rights that every person is entitled to, the results could become lethal. Sadly, we have seen this occur throughout history.


If you are experiencing an intense hatred towards someone or a group of people, then it is our wish that you take steps to resolve this. Please take the journey of learning to understand your hatred.

You could always begin by putting yourself in the shoes of those you hate.